Time flies (tag Tatya) on Magical Arts Room and Sports

Dorian Montoir

August 15, 2020 5:43 PM

Time flies (tag Tatya) by Dorian Montoir

Dorian stepped into MARS, a soft smile on his face as he was greeted with a round, frozen pond. It came only from his imagination but it was pleasant and familiar; the pond where he had gone skating with his friends during their second year Christmas quarantine. He had arranged to meet Tatiana here. He had been determined anyway to make the most of these final weeks, to spend as much quality time with his friends as possible but the conversation with Katerina had made that feel slightly more serious and urgent.

There was a possibility that Jean-Loup would join them later. He generally gave Dorian space, waiting to be asked rather than assuming he could intrude, but his eyes had lit up when Dorian mentioned skating. It was one thing from home they had both missed over the holidays, Jean-Loup possibly more so, and it was so obviously connected with them and their relationship. Dorian did want some just friend time with Tatya, but Jean-Loup would not get a break until later, so hopefully that would work out. He supposed it depended what turns this conversation took.

MARS was cold, as you would expect for outdoor skating. He slid his jacket on, pulling a green beanie with yellow edging from his pocket, along with gloves and a dark blue scarf on which white rabbits skipped. MARS had provided skates, and he was just strapping these on when the door opened.

"Seems like a long time since we were here," he smiled at Tatya, "And yet, also, how did it go by so fast?"

13 Dorian Montoir Time flies (tag Tatya) 1401 1 5

Tatiana Vorontsova

August 21, 2020 7:50 PM

I wish we could slow it down a little. by Tatiana Vorontsova

It had been quite some time since Tatiana had seen MARS in this exact configuration, but she recognized it at once and smiled brightly.

“One day, then the other,” she said when Dorian asked how the time had passed since their second year. “Maybe we do not pay attention to all, so they go fast? But sometimes I think one class is never end – and then, where went the year?” she asked rhetorically, spreading her hands, which were also gloved warmly. Most of her hair was covered with a dark blue knitted hat, which she had embellished with one of her larger, sparklier brooches to make it more interesting. A pair of matching smaller ones, designed like starbursts, further adorned the wide collar of her dark blue coat.

Privately, she was a little concerned, Dorian deciding to revisit a scene from so long ago. Tatiana tried not to think about their impending departure from school – doing so made her want to cry and scream at the same time – but it was hard to deny that it was coming, and she didn’t know what that was going to mean for Dorian. Did he have anywhere to go after he left here? How angry were his mama and papa still? Or, worse – was it safe for him to go home, even if his mama and papa were willing to have him there? What was he going to do, anyway, if he could not go home? Tatiana supposed she’d get a spending allowance once she was home again, as her older sisters had done, but she had no idea how much it actually cost to live as a single person without a family, and therefore no idea how much she could actually help, if it came to that….

“You are smart to think of skate,” she said approvingly, sitting down and beginning to change from her shoes to a pair of skates the room provided, which of course fit perfectly. “It is good to do fun, not study all of our time. I think book gets only more confusing now anyway.”

16 Tatiana Vorontsova I wish we could slow it down a little. 1396 0 5

Dorian Montoir

August 22, 2020 5:54 PM

We may just have to make the most of it by Dorian Montoir

People changed incrementally. You could see the difference after a summer - it was a long enough absence that the changes a person underwent were noticeable. But day by day, you saw the same faces again and again, your own in the mirror and other people's around you, and every day they seemed safe, familiar, and the same. The difference became noticeable when you looked back at photographs. Dorian had been doing that a lot lately, and the day that they had spent in this particular setting had been well-document. They had been so small, so wide eyed, trying to cope with the thought of a Christmas away from their families. He tried not to reflect how useful a lesson that might have turned out to be in his case.

Now, comparing the young woman who stepped through the door with the photograph of a girl he had in his room, he could see the difference, even if he hadn't noticed it happen. As ever, the most striking difference was her hair, which had flowed freely out from her hat last time they had skated. But she was taller, older and wiser too, even if other people didn't think so. Even if she had stopped growing before he had, and he now had the slight lead on height that had been hers in the early days.

"Ma souerette," he smiled, because people could grow, hairstyles could change, but some important things stayed the same. He stood to wrap her in a tight, affectionate hug, trying not to hold on longer than usual, lest she worry that something was wrong, but taking the time to really appreciate the moment nonetheless.

"Time is tricky," he agreed. He allowed her to fasten her skates and then held out a hand, not to steady her but for company, as they stepped smoothly onto the ice together. It was only something they had done once together but they were both well-practised, both knew how... In so many ways they were different, but in so many ways they had always been the two that were the most similar. The outsiders. The non-native speakers. The tea drinkers and ice skaters. The ones to break the moulds?

"Some things are more important," he stated in a conspiratorial undertone, a little grin playing across his features as he denounced the relative importance of studying. He squeezed her hand, lending some weight to the the otherwise glib comment. They had fallen into an easy rhythm, side by side, and it was so tempting to skate and to laugh and to pretend that nothing at all was wrong in the world. But he knew he would kick himself later for that. "How go things?" he asked.

13 Dorian Montoir We may just have to make the most of it 1401 0 5

Tatiana Vorontsova

August 24, 2020 6:27 PM

I suppose that will have to do. by Tatiana Vorontsova

“Shìde,” said Tatiana when Dorian said that some things were more important than studying. “But I think maybe we do not tell the adults this.”

It was interesting, really, all the non-word-using ways there could be to communicate with someone who really knew you, and who you really knew. Her smile as she said that, her tone, and her second statement – those all fit with teasing right back, gleefully ducking away from their responsibilities for a while. She had said ‘yes’ in Chinese, though – his mother tongue, literally – and there were layers and layers of emotion and meaning in that which wouldn’t be apparent, she thought, to anyone but the two of them, and maybe Vladya.

…Except, it occurred to her, that she wasn’t completely sure that the meanings hadn’t changed in light of recent events. It was possible that the word would no longer be received with all the meanings she had put into it. His mama had seen him, briefly, over Christmas, yes, but there were versts and versts between that and things really being all right. Worlds, even, and star systems, maybe even galaxies. She glanced over at him as they continued to glide together, her pale greenish-blue eyes momentarily serious as she said, “I have not thought before, Dorya – “ this with a slight note of contrition – “you still…you like to talk Chinese still? This does not change?” Part of her felt horrible for bringing it up, but it would be worse to find out later that hearing Chinese felt like a stab in the heart to him, and that she had been doing it constantly without realizing.

She considered what to say when he asked her how things went with her. It would be easy enough, of course, to grumble about Transfiguration homework, or talk about Quidditch, but somehow – it was more in how he said the words, she thought, than the words themselves – she didn’t think that was what Dorian meant. There were, it seemed, drawbacks to this ability to communicate beyond words that they had as well as good points. Finally, she lifted one shoulder.

“Eh,” she said. “I hear Sonia - you remember moya sestra Sonia? Sonia probably will have husband soon. Sonia told me Christmas she wants to marry Dmitri Ivanovich, so this is happy - but then it will be all...." Unable to find a word, she whistled several notes in rapid succession, like a noisy little bird twittering away in the springtime. "Only that is music, and they will all be 'Grisha has no wife' and 'Tatya has no husband', very boring, all stupid. Bah! Like me and Grisha, we have nothing better to do, if we want to." She rolled her shoulders as she continued to move. “It is well with you also? Nothing more bad happens?” she asked, trying not to sound too anxious.

16 Tatiana Vorontsova I suppose that will have to do. 1396 0 5

Dorian Montoir

August 26, 2020 9:10 PM

We could also agree to have more of it later by Dorian Montoir

"Da," Dorian agreed, regarding not telling the adults. Technically, that was a category that now included them, as he had so strenuously argued with Katerina. He and Tatya were of a legal age of majority, and theoretically capable of making their own decisions about love and life. It was a point he would defend should anyone try to take that freedom away, whilst simultaneously still feeling like there was a huge gap between him and what he thought of as the real adults.

They skated on, and his mind turned over the grown ups in his life, and how he could turn more into the ones he wanted to be like. How he became enough of an adult to be listened to by the rest... His and Tatya's bodies moved in synchronised motions, keeping in step and hand in hand. As Tatya asked about hearing Chinese, he wondered whether their minds really had done the same, or whether it was an illusion, spun out from his own perception of their closeness, or from how so much was interconnected right now. How almost every line of thought could lead back to home and family and languages and sexuality because those were such prominent strands of his sense of self, and so permanently on his mind. It perhaps would have been more strange if Tatya had turned the subject to something utterly out of tune with his own thoughts, but he was still pleased and comforted by the fact they were moving along together. That was how he wanted it to stay.

"I like," he assured her. He neither wanted to forget his mother, nor assume that this language wasn't going to stay a real and vital part of his life. In his slightly more melancholy moments, he was relieved to have passed it on to Tatya because it meant that he could never lose it altogether, whatever else happened, but that felt like far too pessimistic a way to think. He tried to keep the way things were going at home out of his thoughts about Tatuya speaking Chinese, because they were very separate things, and there was one important element that he didn't want to be touched by the sandness he felt about his family. "You learned because you love me," he stated and it was easy to do so because it was not a boast or an opinion, it was just something undeniably true. It still made him feel warm, of course - love was never to be taken for granted - but he could also feel it with the calm, clear confidence of a known fact. "I would never ask for any part of that to go away," he assured her, and that was where the warmth spread, still cradling his heart but also shaking in his chest. Because that touched so close to the things that frightened him right now.

"Nothing bad," he assured her, settling that point first so that she would not worry, "Things get a little better. There is a little more listening," he added, wanting her to believe that change was possible for her own sake as well as his. He did not dwell too long on himself though. After all, she had brought up the exact subject that he wanted to discuss with her. He had been worried it would be awkward to bring it up, and he wasn't about to miss this opportunity. "What do you want to do instead?" he asked, his tone open and light - one that invited endless answers and adventures as being possible.

13 Dorian Montoir We could also agree to have more of it later 1401 0 5

Tatiana Vorontsova

August 27, 2020 10:54 AM

Or we could do that. by Tatiana Vorontsova

Tatiana nodded, as comfortable with the statement of the obvious as Dorian was when he mentioned why she’d learned Chinese. Technically, in the beginning, it had been a fun puzzle, and she had learned to say things in his languages so that he’d return the favor and speak Russian for her sometimes, but she used it now, at least, for the reason he said. She smiled, though, when he said he wouldn’t want any part of that to go away, presumably regardless of what went on with his parents and siblings. “Nor I,” she said.

There was more listening. Well, that was something. “This sounds good,” she ventured tentatively. “If there is listening, maybe then they understand, someday.” Or at least they would continue to listen, and not just…do the thing where people pretended that members of their own family didn’t exist. Tatiana thought that her family doing that to her would break her heart; it might break Dorian’s everything if his mama and Emilie, at least, did that to him….

For a moment, her mind on that, she didn’t immediately follow when he asked what she would like to do ‘instead.’ “Eh?” she said, then it dawned on her. “Oh – what I do instead of marry. Well – “ she looked sideways. “It is silly,” she warned him. “You may laugh at me. I want to go Yuznaya Amerika.” She shrugged. “Always I read books, when I am small,” she said. “Always I wanted to go see Braziliya, and Kolumbiya, Chile…and I want to see Avstraliya and Indiya. And more of Rossiya. Now I know you, I want to see Kitai, also, and…” She shrugged again. “I can see when I am married, I know,” she said. “But then I must say ‘may I’ and have to stay in chair and think of manery i etiket and la-la-la,” she grumbled. “This is no fun. And I rather do more school than marry. I like to learn things, and also – “ she clicked her tongue, unsure how to express an idea. “When you know things, how to do things, then people talk different to you,” she managed vaguely. “But eh,” she said, with a resigned tilt of her head. “Maybe I can go to see more Rossiya. And then – what they know, where I go, when I am not in the house?” she added, her eyes sparkling with mischief, now, at the ludicrous thought of just going wherever when she was supposed to be going one place, all without telling a soul. It couldn’t practically work – everything would be arranged ahead of time, with people expecting her, so unless she could find someone and convince that person to pretend to be Tatiana Andreyevna for a few months, it wouldn’t work at all – but it was fun to imagine it. "I will say I am going to Sibir', and instead I come meet you in Kitai for a while. This would be fun."

16 Tatiana Vorontsova Or we could do that. 1396 0 5

Dorian Montoir

August 28, 2020 7:45 PM

But the trade off might be more distance by Dorian Montoir

“I hope so,” Dorian stated, when Tatiana commented on how listening would lead to understanding, “And this time, I mean I actually have the hope,” he tried to clarify. He had always hoped it would work out even when there had been limited evidence that that would be the case. “Mama doesn’t want a situation where she cannot see me. Which is good, because I do not want that either. I think she has always been trying to have that - to keep me where I am with her and I am safe. And I never stopped wanting those either, I like very much both of those things. She just didn’t know how to fit this into that. She could see that it made Matthieu hurt me, and that it would make other bad things happen. Keeping me where she wanted me, and where I had always wanted to be - the easiest way was to try to make this go away.” If he didn’t want it to go away though, then it got strange and confusing. That meant taking it all apart and putting it all back together again, and trusting that when they finished that project, there would be a Mama-and-Dorian space and that it would be safe and lovely and recognisable, with all the important things like tea and being her xiao tùzi. They had to trust that they could make that even though no one had given them any instructions on how to do it, and that was very frightening. He wasn’t sure whether they were at that stage yet. Sometimes it felt like they were taking those first tentative steps into doing that, but his Mama wasn’t ready to leap in with both feet just yet. Sometimes, when the project looked too big or too scary, she still lapsed back to suggesting that her way was the best one. But they took steps. Tiny little bunny steps. And even if they didn’t have instructions, they had their love for each other and an agreement not to let go of that. Maybe, at times, that would be the only thread, maybe they would be holding each other and nothing else in the darkness and the fog, but so long as they didn’t let go, they could find their way out - or at least keep hold of something precious.

“I kissed a boy, and you accepted this,” he assured her, when she warned that what she wanted to do was silly. As Tatya talked about her plans, he definitely did not laugh. He also did not stop skating and wrap her in a hug and tell her no and hang on to her as hard as he could even though he very much wanted to. Australia?! Why would anyone go to Australia! That was about as far away from the rest of them as you could get, and he’d never heard anything to recommend it based on culture! And India… He knew nothing about it. He knew very little about most of the places she was suggesting.

“For South America, you should learn Spanish first,” he teased, whilst he sorted through the rest of what she had said. He had known very little about Greece, and he had gone there and found it to be delightful. He was quite sure a lot of people thought unkind things about China, and they were very thoroughly wrong. When he thought of the rest of the world in terms of languages, food and culture instead of adventure and distance, he could see the appeal. Of course, you could begin to immerse yourself in two out of three of those without leaving home… And the culture came on tour via the theatre, or there were things like the MARS rooms, or even more books. He was torn between the fact that the lived experiences he’d had, which he was forced to admit were more vivid and real than any armchair travelling he’d done, and the fact that he had struggled with the thought of Tatya being all the way in Alaska, never mind Australia.

“I would miss you. And I would be scared to let you go away,” he admitted. He found he couldn’t squeeze her hand because at some point his grip had tightened on it without him realising. It was feeling awfully like the shoe being on the other foot, all of a sudden. Here was this person he loved telling him she wanted to do a thing that frightened him, and he wanted to scoop her up and for it not to be true. There was a difference though between wanting it not to be true and being willing to try to persuade her out of it. Hummingbirds did not do well in cages. “But if you want this, I want that you have it. Do you want me to help you plan your escapes?” he asked.

13 Dorian Montoir But the trade off might be more distance 1401 0 5

Tatiana Vorontsova

September 05, 2020 5:07 PM

I'd rather have all the things. by Tatiana Vorontsova

Tatiana nodded, relieved to hear that Madame Montoir did not want a situation that excluded her from Dorian’s life. She did not add that if they were to be safe and together, the ideal situation would be for Dorian to simply behave as a daughter who did not marry. No Jean-Loup, but also no wife, just himself attending to his mother. Tatiana thought it sounded almost as bad as marriage in her case, especially once her siblings were all out of the house, but…She had no idea how to express any of those ideas which would be comprehensible and not emasculate her friend, and that was the smallest issue there.

Bigger by far was the problem which she thought preyed on both of their minds – how they wanted contradictory things all nearly equally. For nothing to change and for everything to change all at once, to get something without giving up anything – to defy the very laws of time and space and society all. Tatiana didn’t think kisses would be enough to make her risk home, but she thought she understood Dorian’s position. The thought of losing Dorian’s love was as sharp as the idea of doing the same with Grisha, or Katya, or Anya and Sonia, Alyosha, Mama and Papa…Perhaps she did not love Jean-Loup that much – yet – but if Dorya did, then simply attending on his mama as a compromise position to avoid marrying a woman simply wasn’t an option.

“This is all very good,” she said. “And…with Emilie? Your papa?” She did not bother asking about Matthieu.

He did not laugh at her, as promised, but her face fell just the same after he responded to her daydream. “This is so,” she admitted about learning Spanish. “You see? Very silly.” She could imagine the word Mama or Katya would use – childish – and it was hard not to see their point right now, but silly was easier to admit to. She was Tatya, the scatterbrained, silly friend in their group. She grinned again, though, when he offered to help her plan an escape, around wincing over the suddenly tighter grip on her hand.

“Escape? That is what you do from…” She was fairly sure he did not know the Russian word for prison and she could not think of it in any other language. “Dom vorov,” she improvised instead – house of thieves. “Not from home! Or not my home,” she added a bit more gently, thinking of how Dorya might have had times when he could have actually needed to escape from his home. “And we must both miss sometimes, unless you say I should live with you and Jean-Loup,” she teased.

Of course, for all she knew, Dorian had imagined that. She could think of it as a pleasant possibility, after all. It was just that it wasn’t terribly realistic. She did not know much about how people actually, practically survived in the outside world, but she thought she knew just enough to know how hard it was going to be for Jean-Loup even to support Dorian in the style to which they were all accustomed. Or at all. She thought Healers made a lot of gold, for working people, but he wasn’t a full Healer yet, and without a family, he would struggle to get a very good position. She had seen the homes of common folk, in passing, in the village. They looked smaller than just the rooms of Tatiana’s house which belonged to her mama. Whole families could live in spaces no larger than those which held the two girls’ bedrooms, their playroom-turned-boudoir, and their bathroom, and Mama and Papa had installed their daughters deliberately in small, plain rooms in an attempt to teach them not to be greedy, silly, careless things. Could any of them really learn to live in less space than that, without much to even make the most of what space they had? Tatiana would figure out how to sell every jewel she owned if Dorian asked her to, or even if he did not but she knew that he needed her to, but what did either of them or Jean-Loup really know about how to survive as common people?

16 Tatiana Vorontsova I'd rather have all the things. 1396 0 5

Dorian Montoir

September 09, 2020 7:52 AM

That might be an issue by Dorian Montoir

"With Émilie it is almost like normal," he stated, "It feels like we have a limited time together, and that is strange. And especially with Mama wanting to always be there. There is not so much time to just be ourselves and whisper secrets and laugh," he admitted. It had felt a little strained, a little like they were trying to cram every element of being a sibling into the the few precious moments that they had - to make them count and get through all the things that mattered, but also to do nothing at all, to not turn their only time together to complicated subjects. And now, looking back, he was concerned that maybe he hadn't made as much of them as he should have... But underneath that all, Émilie was still Émilie. She showed that she cared. "She asks about him, when Mama is not there. She talks about him like this is real. Like he is a person." A person who had somewhat pissed her off, admittedly. Dorian didn't think that Émilie was entirely over Jean-Loup being Jean-Loup but she did seem to be over the fact that Dorian liked boys, and was at least willing to alternate her irritation with interest.

"Papa is... so-so," he shrugged. Dorian had always been Mama's boy. Matthieu was Papa's. His father had made minimal efforts to engage him on the subject. He wasn't sure whether this was because what Matthieu had done was of greater concern to him than why he had done it, because he just couldn't stomach the idea of who and what Dorian was, or because it was clear that whatever Mama decided about Dorian would be what was done. In many ways, it felt like it was just a continuation of their usual dynamics, though somewhat exacerbated by the current situation.

"Why is it silly?" he asked, confused. All he had done, after all, was point out how useful it would be to acquire a fifth language. What was ridiculous about that? "I smile at my own thoughts," he assured her, aware that an amused grin had crossed his face which he didn't want to be misinterpreted. "I was just thinking... why not speak five languages? Or six? Who keeps count?" he grinned, "It does not mean you should not go," he clarified.

"I don't mean it as a bad word," Dorian dipped his head in apology, trying to not be stung by Tatya's emphasis on the fact that she did not need to escape. "I..." He had just meant that, if she wanted to leave home and sneak about behind her family's back, he would facilitate it, if he could. But he was not sure whether their difference of opinion was over the meaning of the word, or over what Tatya really wanted and intended. Put like that, it sounded bad, and he did not want it to be said that he was encouraging her if she wasn't really and truly thinking that way. Katerina’s comments had made it seem like she thought Tatiana was genuinely after this adventure, but maybe she was misreading a wish for an intention - and maybe so was he.

He pondered the situation. He was fairly sure she was not serious about coming to live with him. He would have put a roof over her head if he thought it would help but he rather suspected it would just be claustrophobic, as it was bound to be rather a small one. He couldn't offer Tatya the lifestyle he suspected she wanted. And he supposed that was the crux of the current dilemma.

"I meant only that I would give you help if I could. But I suppose you have to decide," he admitted, realising that his sister had to face the same uncomfortable truths and choices he had, just under a different disguise. "Which things are most important? Which things are you willing to give up to get something else?"

13 Dorian Montoir That might be an issue 1401 0 5

Tatiana Vorontsova

September 17, 2020 9:42 PM

Depends on how ethical you are, I guess. by Tatiana Vorontsova

Tatiana smiled, relieved, when Dorian said that with Emilie, things were almost normal. “That is good, all,” she said. “With Emilie, at least.” She wanted to make a joke about how it was also very good that Emilie was smart enough to comprehend that Jean-Loup was, in fact, a person, but she wasn’t sure she could pull it off in a way where it would land properly. She was not entirely sure if this had anything to do with everyone’s language comprehensions, or if it was just not something to make a proper joke about. “I am glad Emilie is not stupid,” she said instead. “It would be much hard for you, if Emilie was stupid, and I would want to fuss her. Your papa…he come around,” she said, trying to sound confident there.

She laughed at the idea of learning fifth and sixth languages. “You do not think my brain will go – “ she used her free hand to gesture from the side of her head, as though it was exploding. “I do not even speak good in four! Know some all, all none.”

She felt her attempts to hold on to a light mood dissolving despite her best efforts as Dorian continued talking. She sighed, squeezing his hand, too.

“Ah, Dorya,” she said. “It is bad, no? That all this world must be so hard. It is so hard to have all things. But at least we have – you help me, I help you,” she said. “Whenever, however, yes?”

That should have been enough to restore levity, thoughts of good times, but Tatiana found herself remaining uncharacteristically serious. After a moment, she said, “You know – j’adore bijoux. But Mama and Papa give them to all the sisters also. You know why? Mama says – so if we need to escape someday. If husband is bad, or the world has trouble. Mama says, keep bijoux close, then you can get away, find someone else take care of you, go back to Mama and Papa, or to Grisha. And this is good – better than the mama who says do not come back. But – “ she bit her lip, grimaced, tried to think of words, before exhaling in exasperation. “I do not want always – always wait for bad, always do what this one, that one wants, to make it better – when I do what I want, eh? Look you – have you ever had idea that I am – “ she made another face, searching for words. “Bah. Lyublyu tebya. Lyublyu moi brat. But you, him, not…you both, you are very high, very good! But this does not make me feel low. Ty ponimaesh?” she asked, checking that he comprehended her attempts to explain the concept of not feeling inferior to men.

“Why I not own some house? Other have done this,” she said. “Moi sestry – all have names of tsaritsy! Not the normal kind – Anna Ioannovna, Ekaterina Alekseyevna, they have Russia for themselves, and Sofiya – eh, two stories there. But you see? And it is not only there. In Angliya, they have korolevy, and sometimes even their volshebniki have woman who is in charge. I read istoriya,” she added proudly. “So. Is very stupid to say, eh, Tatiana must have a man to take care of her. I do not know what I will do,” she admitted, “but – I do not want to leave house on my toes if a man is stupid, hide bijoux in my dress to buy bread. I throw a stupid man out instead,” she said shortly. “Or if he tells me I must go here, must not go there – stupid! This is what I will not have.”

OOC: Tatiana’s descriptions of history are broadly accurate – Anna Ioannovna did rule Russia in the eighteenth century. “Ekaterina Alekseyevna” is better known as Catherine the Great, and is also one of the “Sofiyas” Tatiana mentions – her birth name, prior to her conversion to Russian Orthodoxy, was Sophie. The other Sofia was not, technically, tsaritsa, but ruled as a regent for many years, so Tatiana counts her anyway. These were not the only examples of female rulers in Russia, just some examples who happened to share first names with Tatiana’s three sisters.

Translations of terms I don’t think she’s used before – korolevy is plural of Koroleva, “queen”. Angliya is England, and “volshebniki” is “wizards.” Her reference to women magical leaders in England is based on history established in the Schoolbooks.

16 Tatiana Vorontsova Depends on how ethical you are, I guess. 1396 0 5

Dorian Montoir

October 01, 2020 2:15 AM

Or how lucky by Dorian Montoir

Dorian gave a little nod at the idea his father would 'come around.' He wasn't totally convinced on that front. His father had always been a bit more removed, although there were moments where they bonded... Books, Canadian Chinese food. He could remember having guilty little picnics in his office when Mama was away, but he had always been closer to his mother. He suspected that his father would follow her lead... If she came around, if she found ways to be happy and to let him be, to include him and his boyfriend, then father wouldn't stop her. And maybe he'd be there sometimes too, in the background. Still, it was just easier to believe in the best and nod. Maybe it was a bad thing to say, but it wasn't the relationship that mattered most to him.

"Eh, so you have some spaces," he suggested when she said she knew bits of four languages but none of all. He knew the feeling - there were some things that were much easier to talk about in English for him now, and yet he constantly found himself running across things he understood but not could translate from both of his home langauages. "Why not fill them in with Spanish? Home words in Russian, Transfiguration theory in English, travel words in Spanish," he grinned.

The conversation turned more serious after that. There were words, he was sure. Single words for a concept so universal. Reciprocity, he thought, It was basically the same in French, so easy to remember. But it sounded cold and technical. 'I help you, you help me - whenever, however' sounded much better.

"Da, kanyeshna," he agreed firmly.

Tatya's following explanation was a little tangential and circuitous, but he was more than used to following this by now, neatly skipping around the holes left by lack of grammar or vocabulary until they arrived at the destination, even if it was by a much longer route. He wondered if, after all this time, it was more accurate to say he was fluent in Tatiana than in Russian, English or any of the rest of it.

"Ya ponimayu," he assured her. "They make for us a lot of limits. No doing this, no doing that. Even though sometimes much, much bigger than their imagination is possible. Money should not just be for running away. You should be able to have your own places and your own ideas," he agreed, aware he was straying back into actively inciting rebellion. But Tatya wasn't stupid. She wasn't talking about money and opportunities like they fell from the sky and did not have consequences. She understood what she was doing. The trouble was that no one else understood her for doing it.

"No stupid bad husband for you," he agreed. "You need to throw one out, you call me. And I will cheer you on, or get Jean-Loup to help," he added jokingly, pretty sure he wasn't going to be much use in any literal kind of throwing. "I help you, you help me. Whenever, however," he echoed.

13 Dorian Montoir Or how lucky 1401 0 5