Someone said I should be worried about you. [Leonor] on Library

Felipe De Matteo

March 26, 2020 5:21 PM

Someone said I should be worried about you. [Leonor] by Felipe De Matteo

Felipe didn’t know exactly what to make of the letter he’d received. Upon opening it and discovering the sender, he had been pretty sure Jessica Hayles was dying. Why else would she reach out now? What else would she have to say that was important enough to warrant a letter but not a face-to-face interaction? At some point, about halfway through, he realized that his heart was in his throat. He swallowed hard, trying to clear the sensation, but found that it would not go away. Its cause was unclear, although he had a few suspicions. The nerves in his stomach, however, were much more easily discernible. Felipe would have to talk to Leonor

The De Matteo siblings had never been close, but particularly not over the past few months. It was odd because it seemed like the sort of thing that would have made them closer. However, Felipe suspected it was a bit more like a royal monarchy situation than he would normally admit of his own family. Inasmuch as Felipe had abdicated, Leonor had gotten everything she had ever wanted. However, that meant two things: first, she was finding out, undoubtedly, that it was not everything she had ever wanted at all; and second, she would always be second fiddle.

Felipe had given up his inheritance, but he was still the heir by birthright. That meant little to his parents, who would not go back on changing things unless Leonor and he both asked them to, but it meant something to Leonor. He could see it in the way she looked at him across the dining table at home, and the way she passed him in the halls. The best thing Felipe could do for his sister anymore was to stop being her brother.

He folded the note and tucked it into his pocket, and then began collecting his things to head to the library. He’d been spending as little time in the Common Room or his dorm as possible since two of the four people he most tried to avoid at Sonora were in his own House, and the movements were easy. Routine. One step and then another. One breath and then another. In, out.

22 Felipe De Matteo Someone said I should be worried about you. [Leonor] 1434 1 5

Leonor De Matteo

March 26, 2020 5:22 PM

Well I don't. by Leonor De Matteo

Leonor didn’t spend that much time in the library Fall term, and would have preferred to do the same now. Life had different ideas, though, and it was just one more reminder that nothing was ever as it seemed on the outside. She hated to admit that Felipe made this whole thing look easy, mostly because the consistency of a pained expression on his face and his utterly boring personality just didn’t make anything look easy, but she had to admit that he had at least kept it together pretty well. She supposed that was in large part to his friendships with Zara and, at one point, Jessica

On the whole, Leonor thought Zara was the nicer of the two. If nothing else, she seemed to be paying genuine attention when she spoke to someone, and she mostly left Leonor to her own devices. When Zara had visited, she’d come as Felipe’s friend and that was all. When Jessica visited, Leonor had felt distinctly as though she was also supposed to be present and that was just exhausting. She’d enjoyed the chance to go to Atlanta, but wouldn’t have done if her parents hadn’t suggested it. And, of course, Atlanta had been terrible for the long term, so there was that.

She pushed thoughts of Felipe and Felipe’s friends out of her mind as she tried to focus on the books on the table in front of her. Some of them were related to her classwork and several unfinished essays were laying about, revelatory of Leonor’s process. Others were related to her new duties, and most of those were only half done as well. She was meant to be studying letters to various connections in Europe and identifying the differences in how politeness manifested for each country, language, or family. It was much less interesting than she had hoped it would be, in part because way too many of them were in English.

It was bittersweet when Felipe interrupted her work by taking the seat across the table from her. He looked anxious in the way that he did when he was trying to pretend he wasn’t. His face was pale and his eyes were dark and his mouth was drawn. His hair was also funny colors, but Leonor cared way too little to ask about that. Felipe could do what he wanted now, couldn’t he? Just like she’d once been able to do. They made eye contact but neither of them said anything for what seemed like a long time.

“What?” Leonor finally demanded with a sigh, leaning back in her chair and raising an eyebrow at her brother. She felt defensive, but couldn’t quite identify why. Well, she didn’t want to identify why at least.

22 Leonor De Matteo Well I don't. 1471 0 5

Felipe De Matteo

March 26, 2020 5:23 PM

Oh. by Felipe De Matteo

Felipe thought that that was a very good question. He wasn’t sure what to say or how to answer it, and was surprised that she didn’t say anything about his hair. They had seen each other around Sonora since Zara had dyed it for him, but they hadn’t actually spoken face-to-face. He supposed that she had other things to worry about. With no logs or invoices or letters to pore over, Felipe found himself with a lot more free time than he’d expected. He probably should have spent some of it preparing how to bring up the letter that he’d received from Jessica

For a moment, he considered just putting it out on the table for Leonor to read. However, the stack of correspondence already before her made him think she probably wouldn’t appreciate an addition, even if the letter itself wouldn’t have made her angry. He very much suspected that it would.

“How’s it going?” he asked, running his hand through his hair. “With… everything?”

If Leonor hadn’t already been raising an eyebrow at her brother, she would have then. “Perfectly well, thank you. Just… ”

“Catching up?” Felipe offered, using Jessica’s choice of words. “I thought that maybe you wanted help. Not because you need it,” he interrupted her indignant expression with his hands up. “But because I could probably make this all easier for you.”

22 Felipe De Matteo Oh. 1434 0 5

Leonor De Matteo

March 26, 2020 5:23 PM

Yeah so if you could just go away. by Leonor De Matteo

Leonor glared at her brother for a moment. She had hated him for a long time because he was a boy and because he was born first. Then she hated him for putting those things aside. She hated him for being as bad at leading as he was at being a brother and she hated him for making her hate him because that sort of made her hate herself. Ugh, and here she hadn’t wanted to think too much about such things.

Eventually, she sighed, and allowed herself to relax her expression some before nodding curtly. “I don’t need it,” she emphasized, trying not to make it sound like a question. She was gratified by Felipe bowing his head in understanding or agreement or at least collaboration; he wouldn’t make her feel bad for not knowing stuff.

She bit the inside of her mouth, trying to decide whether to trust him and where to start if she was really going to do it. Shrugging nonchalantly, she waved a hand over the nearest letter she’d been looking at.

Felipe leaned forward to see what she was asking about, even though she wasn’t really asking. He thought that at some point he would have to explain to her the importance of being able to ask for and accept help gracefully and with appropriate displays of gratitude, but it would probably feel a little too much like ‘I told you so’ right now, so he held that lesson for another time.

“Ah, the duke,” he said with a grimace, remembering the Italian man’s proclivity for verbosity. “His daughter has been sick for a long time. They’ve been trying to figure out whether there are any potions or medicines local to other provinces that may be able to help.”

Leonor opened her mouth in surprise for only a moment before snapping it shut again. She leaned forward and pointed at a word she couldn’t quite make out. “So that’s… what’s that?” It made her want to punch her brother that he didn’t have to even look hard at it.

“That’s his nickname for his daughter. He calls her his baby mouse, topolino, and combines her name with that word.”

Leonor frowned. “How could I have known that?”

22 Leonor De Matteo Yeah so if you could just go away. 1471 0 5

Felipe De Matteo

March 26, 2020 5:25 PM

Are you sure? by Felipe De Matteo

Rolling his shoulders, Felipe sat back again with a sigh. “You couldn’t have. Not unless you’d been doing this your whole life.” He realized then what Jessica had been talking about. Whatever she might like to think, and however suited she was to the task at hand, Leonor did not know what she needed to know. She simply hadn’t been educated for it. She had an eleven year disadvantage on Felipe, not counting the age difference between them. “If you want, we could meet up a couple times a week,” he offered slowly, gauging her expression as best he could. She wasn’t very good at maintaining composure and he added that to the list of things to go over with her. “I can help you. If you want.”

Leonor crossed her arms and looked at Felipe with a hard expression. She looked very much like their mother when she did that, although she didn’t realize it. “I don’t like you very much,” she told him plainly.

Felipe swallowed hard and pressed his lips together into a sad smile. “I don’t like me very much either, princesa.”

Leonor didn’t show that she was surprised. Maybe she wasn’t really. But somewhere, a wall she hadn’t realized she’d built started to come down. she didn’t say anything, but leaned over to retrieve her calendar from her bag and began looking for days when she’d be free. Felipe did the same.

22 Felipe De Matteo Are you sure? 1434 0 5